A Bed, Bed, My Kidney for a Bed?

I've Known for a long tome that we needed a new bed but last night was the final Straw. I am sleeping in a hole the size of the Grand Canyon and Debbies side of the bed is just one big mass of lumps. The only comfortable spot is right in the middle of the mattress.

I am so desperate for a new Bed that last night I had a dream that It became legal to sell one of your Kidneys for profit, so I put one of mine on the market, and as luck would have it I was able to sell one of my kidneys for quite a handsome some of money. More than enough to buy a great bed. The only Problem is , I am related to "Murphy" You know, The Guy whos law says that if something can go wrong it will go wrong, Yep you guessed it. My other Kidney shut down. I guess I'll put a piece of plywood under the mattress and use it a while longer.